Day 12: it's the weekend again. my biggest trigger, today has just been a disaster. i went to the dr this morning to check in after being on sertraline for two weeks and after waiting 40 minutes passed my timeslot she took me in. she didn't remember who i was or why i was there, i had to fill in a little mental health questionnaire, of which i scored really high. but in the box that said "thinking about self harming or thinking you are better off not here" i checked "no" because i don't think like that. i feel alot of negativity about myself right now but that is not one of them. she acted like she didn't believe me. so... after my appointment i was going to visit my mum, i must have bought every cake in the shop on my way. i ate it all and left my mum with the remains. afterward i felt so sick and dizzy. i wanted to be sick so badly, i didn't. i walked home and didn't eat again until dinner time. i made myself my favourite, fajitas. i thought a bit of self care would mend my down mood. i put the kids to bed, had a long shower, shaved my legs and washed my hair. i still feel sick but i am not going to be. tomorrow is a brand new day. today wasn't even that awful. i just interpreted the dr wrong i'm sure. going to put on the soaps and have a cup of tea before bed. one bad day does not mean the whole week has been bad. 💕
Hello loves 💘 happy friday!!! i hope y’all are having a wonderful end of the week. today i wanted to talk about something a little more serious:
i get so many dms and comments from girls saying they wish they were as “pretty” as me or they are jealous of how i look, also girls telling me that they are f*t and ugly and will never be as pretty as me. these comments make me so so heartbroken because i have been there, i can’t tell you how many times i’ve sat on instagram and felt disgusted with myself after looking at beautiful people and models and vacations and things i will never afford. then look in the mirror and criticize every square inch of myself and wonder why i don’t look like the girls i see on instagram. its a horrible feeling and it is so bad for your self-esteem and mental health. i always want to promote positivity and self-love and never want any of you to feel that horrible feeling of comparison. “comparison is the thief of joy”. so today i want all of you to work extra h*****n loving yourself and being thankful for the beautiful body you were given. i struggle a lot with self-esteem issues and seeing myself in a very negative light so i know how horrible it can feel. so here is a picture of me with no make up on, super frizzy unwashed hair and a zit that i messed with so much that it turned into a scab. when i look at this picture i pick myself apart in 1 million ways but me and all of you need to learn to appreciate ourselves for what we are. we are beautiful, we are healthy, we are lucky to be alive and we are unique in every single way. 💕if you guys want to make my day: comment your favorite physical trait and your favorite inner (personality) trait about yourselfs💕
love u guys so much😍
Fbf- you know the saying what happens in vegas stay in vegas. often times we get so excited to go on vacation just to escape reality. but at this moment i chose to change somethings. why can’t life be a vacation. during my journey of #selflove i begin to #create a life i no longer wanted to escape from. we have to learn to #liveourbestlife in real life. not just on vacation. #miaminights#memories #lookbackatit😂😂😂
Tai, do you promise to love taiesha abrams with an agape love that christ would be pleased with? do you promise to accept her for who she is, forgive her for any wrong she has done to herself or others?do you promise to love her, comfort her, cherish her, honor her and keep her for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health and forsaking all others, be faithful to her so long as you shall live? do you promise to protect her and ensure that she stays obedient to god’s will for her life?! do you promise to help her keep god first in all her ways and to keep the word of god on her heart, in her mind and on her lips? do you promise to keep her focused on the lord with a spirit of discernment about who should be in her life and who should not, according to god’s will? will you help her to do right by her body, mind and spirit and honor it as god’s holy and precious temple? do you promise to allow her to keep dreaming the wildest dreams and manifesting all that her heart desires that lines up with god’s will? i do! i do! i do! #selflove#godsdivinewill#godsplan#godstiming#livingmybestlife
“self love: when you feel whole, caring, invested in & feeling powerful about who you are & your life aka self
liberation. self restoration: the intentional steps you take
to achieve self-love from an “unwhole” place.” - adrienne maree brown ✨💕
I think we can all agree that we have good and bad days-but do you ever have days where nothing in particular happens and you still feel low?
i do. i’ve been struggling lately to bring myself out of a funk.
most often, i think we look to our external circumstances to see the reason why we are feeling low. i went to look there too, and i found nothing.
what i discovered is that my funk was the results of internal circumstances. i let my inner mean girl take charge of my thoughts and didn’t even realize it.
she likes to tell me that i’m not enough-or that i’m not capable of achieving. harsh i know-but in her defense, she’s just trying to keep me safe.
however, safety is not what i need and some days i can gently assure her that she’s wrong and everything is fine. other days, like today, i have to yell at her and tell her to sit down and shut up-cause i’ve got work to do!
how do i do that? affirmations girlfriend.
affirmations are a way to quite literally redirect your thoughts and neuro path ways so that you can change the way you think. it takes practice but it’s a surprisingly simple way to evict your inner mean girl. #gtfo
i am worthy, capable, and deserving of achieving my goals because any other outcome is not an option.
i am fruitful and productive
i am more focused and intentional today that i was yesterday.